Blog #8: Dear Dad

Dear Dad,

Happy Birthday! I hope you are doing alright celebrating your birthday without me around. ;) I imagine at some point today you will find yourself eating something chocolate and opening a hilarious handmade card filled with doodles from Gavin. At least, that’s what I’d like to imagine is happening…

When I was young, I was Mom’s “mini-me.” We all know I looked exactly like her, not to mention our similar interests and personalities. Now, although I still share a number of similarities with Mom (something I’m very grateful for), I’ve come to realize that you and I are alike in more ways than most people give us credit for. One trait I’d like to think we share is our toughness. A memory that sticks out to me is one of our family walks when I was younger to go pick wild blackberries, even though you don’t even eat them. The best berries are always guarded by the nastiest thorns, but that never stopped you from diving in. I remember the slew of partially self-censored cuss words that naturally slipped off your tongue as dozens of thorns jabbed you at once. Thinking my small, nimble body would be better at avoiding the thorns than you, I walked into the blackberry death trap following right in your path. Nobody else dared to follow us into the thickets, but the two of us picked the best berries until our hands bled. Everyone in our family is tough, but part of me likes to think that you and I can be particularly tough when the need arises.

Additionally, I see similarities in the way that we both care very deeply for the people around us, but we often choose to show it instead of say it. We are both very stoic people— even when we feel them very deeply, our emotions often don’t make their way to the perceptible surface. I fear that in the past, this stopped us from connecting as well. I didn’t understand my own method of navigating and portraying emotions, let alone someone else’s. And because we didn’t openly share the depth of our love for each other, I feared you didn’t know it existed.

Obviously, I have since realized this isn’t the case. I always knew you cared very deeply about me, but I began to recognize it in ways I had previously overlooked. It wasn’t necessarily there in the cuddles and words of affirmation Mom would exude, but it was in the times you would buy me ice cream and candy bars when Mom didn’t know, or when you insisted I learn how to change my own tire. Your care for me has always manifested itself in a desire to make my life better. Somewhat similarly, I express my love and care for others through my actions, whether it be through gifts or simple favors. Though I know my skills in verbally expressing my love are poor, more than anything, I just hope that you and the family realize this does not take away from how much I do love you.

Dad, you are the hardest working person I know, by far one of the funniest, and the one who I credit most for my freestyle rapping abilities. (All those conversations spoken only in rhymes really paid off). I miss you terribly, and I hope the unbearable cold back home has forced you to stay inside and take a break. You deserve it. Happy birthday, I’ll be home before you know it.

“No more rhyming now, I mean it!”

“Anybody want a peanut?”

I love you,

Kaylo