Well... hi everyone.
The past 364 days have absolutely been some of the best of my life, thanks in no small part to all of you. Though we all know how much I value my independence, I think my most joyous moments were the times we shared. Between the adventures, conversations, mishaps, arguments, dancing, and singing, and all the tears, laughter, hugs, and affirmations shared, there's a lot I could talk about in this "final note." I will try to keep it brief.
When I was preparing to leave for India, I expected to stray from the program as much as possible. I'm not much of a "group itinerary" traveler, so I intended to get along with my program mates, but to do my own thing for the most part. After all, I like to travel alone. I couldn't have been more wrong.
Everything I wanted to "find" in India, I found in and through all of you. I wanted clarity for my future, and even though I still lack it, a teary-eyed conversation on my bed with Sarah gave me clarity on how to find that clarity. I remember it as one of the key moments when I decided to stop doing things I didn't enjoy for the sake of my reputation, and instead to pursue whatever lights me up, makes me feel alive, at that particular time in my life.
When I felt embarrassed about wanting to better myself through self-reflection and "self-help" books and allowing myself to be more easily inspired, Mary Alice was there to call bullsh*t and be the loudest cheerleader and biggest motivator. Her openness and pride in her journey amaze me, and make me a better person. One time she saved my life with a bowl of oatmeal.
When it comes down to it, I just wanted to grow and change in India— I wanted to come out the other end a better version of myself, at least by a little bit. With the help of the people around me, I practiced being better. The boys taught me patience, and Sequoia showed me authenticity day in and day out. (I admire her "realness", but damn, she's just freaking hilarious too.) Lizzy coached me in tough conversations, and Dr. Chakraborty gave me an example of how beautiful and powerful passion can be. Govind showed me kindness.
From my first day in India to the last, I was unbelievably lucky to have had such wonderful people surrounding me. If I had the chance to do it all again without them, I'd say no thanks. And, from the blog's inception to paragraphs written in the backseat of an Uber, they have been with me every step of the way. Long after the blog became about my life in Iowa instead of India, I'd open the blog and still think about these wonderful people, and how it never would have even been started without their support.
The same goes for Ally, the pinnacle of dedication and loyalty, even when I was literally halfway across the world. From day one, Ally has read every single post, and made me a priority even when I was so far. I've spent half of this blogging year taking on the world together again with Ally, and it's pretty cool to have someone so badass by my side. She is a queen, and her support is incredible.
Sofia has taught me gratitude and ease, strolling the streets of Chicago together just laughing and being grateful to be there. She makes me feel at home, as she does with everyone, and is always able to see the silver lining.
This list could go on; Emma and Manuel and Lena welcomed me into their homes and back into their lives. The time I spent with them in their own little parts of Europe were unforgettable. Courtney and Aundrea both had amazing adventures, yet reunited with me and talked like old times. Tak adventured with me in Ireland and Anshul and Shreya spent the time to learn about me. Mathias took me for a ride on his motorbike.
In the past year I have made new friendships and strengthened old. I have bared parts of my soul and cooked them many meals. Together we have lived a lifetime of experiences in a mere 365 days. I am so so grateful, and it's only right to start closing up the blog with a post in their honor.
The same is true for my family.
Though I had the misfortune of spending less time with them than in any other year of my life, the role my family has played was crucial. Their support was unmatched. I mean, even when I tell people that I studied in India, half of their responses are "Your parents let you do that?!" to which I say "They didn't just 'let' me, they were excited for me and supported me the whole time."
I couldn't be more lucky with a family that's so excited for all of my adventures. That's a special feeling.
I wrote at least one blog post for every person in my family this past year, and it's simply because they mean so much to me. Most everything I do reminds me of them somehow, whether it's reminiscent of a memory we have or it's just something I think they would love. Walking around Rishikesh over my spring break was amazing, but I ached to be able to do it with Mariel and my mom. I wished they were all there for my Bollywood performance, or just to experience a day in the life of Kailyn in India.
Anyone who's met the family says we are all exactly the same, which I don't totally think is true even though it definitely is. People also marvel at how close we are, which makes me proud. I love singing and laughing and dancing and playing games and making up songs with you guys. I love being around you.
You are all my best friends, both individually and as a big old messy familial conglomerate. Thank you.
To be quite honest I wasn't totally sure where I was headed with this blog post, but I knew I needed to say thank you to the amazing people in my life before closing up the blog once and for all.
You know, I think most people consider themselves lucky if they have a couple real, true friends by their side. I was lucky enough to start with five right out of the gate with my family, and I'm not even sure how I got so lucky to add all the other wonderful people who are so central to my life. What I do know is that I'm eternally indebted to Morningside and to USAC for bringing me and these people together, and I owe the Universe a big one for choosing to put me in this family.
Thank you all for accepting me, for validating me and supporting me and holding me and guiding me. As a human person I'm just a cardboard box marked with "fragile," and you all handle me with care. Thank you for that, and for everything. I couldn't have done it without you, and I love you.